Tuesday, April 12, 2011

#2 Loathing in process... ...

Living in a shell all these while made a dull boy.

It was then when I started to think about purchasing a house or even my own car. At a young age like this and with no stable income, how could I afford all of these?

Multilevel marketing could be the solution or opening up a conventional business? It seems like that's the only way you could get the hell out of the working environment which sometimes can be bitter or sweet depending on situations.

Future is rather bleak for me here.

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Frustration often strikes whenever I ask myself now and then, "Why am I here for in the first place?", "Am I even qualified to be here?", "Why do I feel ignored or alienated" etc. Such feelings grow day by day. I wonder I could contain them how much longer?

I have done my best to review and to absorb day by day the knowledge that I lack of but reviewing won't do me any good. I really need practices to know where my weakness is.

In the midst of being busy, am I really that kind of person who is not worth to be concerned of or do I look like a greedy person to you? I admit that what I have chosen is for my own benefit but I did put my very best effort to study about.

Mind you, I did not take it just because I'm going to gobble up the money that you have. I just want to do something that I find interesting. If I do it well, you will also get benefit. One thing for sure, I need to write something to impress you.

Sheesh, sounds like I'm begging for mercy.

Pride aside, I really hope to do something instead of sitting ogling at people and staring at words without talking to people. It's making me going back to my own shell like I used to be. I want to be the outspoken one in Uni once more.

I thought I was growing but instead it seems that I'm shrinking... ...

I'm being more pessimistic... ...

Gah! Almighty one, please save me!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

#1 Major boredom strikes!

I’ve changed my blog and post title because they sounded corny, now that I just realized it.

Another reason is that I’ve been strike by major boredom and I’m currently suffering from a disease called, “lack-of-socialization”. I could count how many words or sentence that I’ve uttered for the past few weeks. I seriously need a good chat with anyone at all, including aliens! I’ve approached some of them but it seems like either they are too shy or they are too engrossed in their work.

A major crackdown!

I fully understand that I’ve chosen this job on my own free will and I shall take full responsibility of it instead of complaining. I never knew that this job would be so unproductive and de-socializing. I’m the type of person if given any tasks to be fulfilled; I’ll gladly do it with no complaints.

In other words, I want to be busy! Give me work and I’ll shut my mouth. Period.

Maybe I should think about approaching my boss to give me some work. Do you think he/she will entertain me? Think otherwise, if you are a person with a packed schedule, would you even entertain a lowly fella who seeks for more work and responsibilities to be appointed?

I wonder.

I could have done some extensive reading or maybe prepare some necessary documents needed for my admission as an employee. I’ll let you into my shoes then. How does it feel when you have to read non-stop every single working hour? Unless you’re a typical book-lover, then it’s my bad.

Heck! I’m on the verge of nerve-breaking. Should I leave or should I make the bold move of complaining?

Help me, Almighty one! T.T

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Growing 0.25 cm - Ushering the new year

2011 is here for the past 1 week already. As what normal people would say, many things have happened throughout the year of 2010.

Come to think of it, what have I achieved in year 2010? I don't think it was really that significant at all. The only thing I can think of I have graduated from UTAR. That's all, I guess.

Maybe I should have kept a diary for myself and start jotting down every single thing that happens in my life. In other words, I should appreciate every moment.

Yeah! That will be my new year resolution. Pen down every single moment of my life; be it good or bad.

Yes! So be it!